Germany...

Last week I was in Frankfurt, Germany attending the Musikmesse exhibition for work...

I've never seen cloud formations like these before; they were awesome... Until you descend through them on a Boeing 737, then they are rough as you like! :0)

I landed right next to the new Airbus A380, which had just made it's first flight full of passengers from New York to Germany - This photo does not do it justice, as this aircraft is HUMONGOUS!
Seeing it in real life, rather than on TV, is stunning.

In the airport toilets I noticed this, which made me chuckle. It says, "If you are reading this you are having a pooh!" :0]

I then took a 20-minute taxi ride from the airport to the hotel. All the taxis in Germany are nice new Mercedes, completely unlike the crappy Kidderminster cabs... Is that five 6s?

"Tripod" and "The Silver Fox" preferred this method of transport!!!

Frankfurt Skyline

On the way to the exhibition, you pass many impressive bank HQs

I can't even begin to describe how enormous these exhibition halls are. This is just the outside entrance to one of the halls! There are 10 of them linked with moving walkways. Each of the halls are about the size of a football pitch. You could literally walk for hours.


This was our section on our German distributor's stand.

This slight technical hitch made me laugh - when we first plugged a laptop into this hired plasma screen, it appeared upside down. We all stood back and in synchronicity said, "oh"

On the subject of errors, Germany is home to the worst hair style EVER called the 'Mullet' - For those of you who are new to this popular 1980s cut, it's basically, spiky(ish) on-top, very short on the sides and long at the back. Ewww
Here are two classic examples I managed to catch on camera, both well worthy of the title being pronounced "moo-lay" for extra class :]

Exhibition fuel consisted of Weiner Shcnitzel in a crusty roll. Mmm

Unfortunatly, the exhibition is rife with Chinese copies of UK products, but we noticed a slight mistype in this very nicely put together glossy Chinese catalogue of ripped-off speakers... This tech blurb is supposed to be titled 'Full Range Speaker' - A little bit of devine justice eh!


Parking can be an arse in Frankfurt, but not if you own a Smart car

Check this gigantic toy dog thing I spotted! How cool is that?
The orignal toys were threaded with elastic, so when you press the button in the base, it collapses and moves etc. This, sadly, was a none-working version. I want one outside my house right NOW!

I was quite tempted to go in here and do the test, dead pan faced :]

A 'specialty' shop in Frankfurt's red light district.
One of the crew accidentally dialled his girlfriend's mobile in his pocket while browsing through this shop! He had much explaining to do as the 15 minute message included statements such as, "Oh my word, that's massive?" etc, etc. Ooops

Me trying on Big Rich's glasses. GEEK... Specky T***

My fave restaurant in the world, the Steinernes Haus.
They serve you a hefty lump of raw fillet-steak on a hot lava stone and you cook it yourself. This is accompanied by a huge beer that takes two hands to lift until you've drank some!

My hotel was on this street. Try saying it to a German taxi driver after a few beers :[]

Today, I'm Most Angry About: A Chav trying to overtake his mate in a 30mph zone into oncoming traffic, me being at the front! He got a blast of my horn as I emergency braked, but he just took a drag of his fag and blasted his horn back at me - What a nob!!! Grrr
Grrr-O-Meter Rating: 8/10

Today's Top Tip: Record the sound of your washing machine, then confuse the neighbours by playing it back on a battery operated player during a power cut!