Wednesday, 26 April 2006

Euro Disney...

A mostly successful and enjoyable trip to Euro Disney was had, with a few surprises, many laughs and long days (oh, and much French girlie ogling).

Luggage:
The first minor event happened at Birmingham airport, where we had forgotten to put luggage labels on all our suitcases, so my sister thought it would be a good idea to Biro her last name all over the top of her suitcase and add a large squiggle or two for good measure. Nice idea; however, the suitcase was mine and she had mistaken it for hers! Cheers Sis. I will graffiti your maiden name all over YOUR case next time! ;-)

Aeroplanes:

We flew there and back on a BAE-146 after all, woo hoo, and it was great. Here it is on the runway in Paris after we had landed:

Phwoar

Car Hire:
After wandering aimlessly around Paris's humongous Charles de Gaulle airport, we eventually found our baggage (mine had now become rather unique and easy to spot) and went to find the hire a car place, using very ambiguous directions.
Putting my bestest Frenglish into use, it went surprisingly smoothly and away we went on our one hour drive to Disney Land.
Driving a manual left hand drive on the right hand side of the road always causes entertainment, especially at roundabouts. Keep to the right, right, left, no right...

1st day... Mind The Step:
The first day, turned out to be a bit of a disaster, as my graceful sister didn't notice a curb, a mere 10 yards into the park, and falls down it twisting her ankle really badly. She dropped like a sack of spuds and caused much confusion as to what was wrong and what had actually happened. Before we knew it, Disney's French fire and first aid crew, who couldn't speak a word of English, surrounded her and they whisked her away to an on-site hospital. She then had to be taken to a local hospital for X-rays.
I can't see what the fuss was all about! ;-)
This affliction meant my bro in law had to accompany her to the hospital leaving me to entertain these two terrors all day...

Yes, me look after children, all day, me, children, pfff.
It was good fun actually, wandering around fantasyland, eating toffee apples and they thought it was most entertaining to refer to me as Dad all day. Grrr

2nd Day... Whoa:
Day two comprised of doing everything, bar the big 'Rock 'n Roller Coaster', in Disney's Studio park.
One of the best sections is a road train ride around lots of large props from many famous films, but half way round, the trains stops and your involved in a mini disaster set, where they simulate an earth quake by heavily tilting and shaking the carriages, setting fire to an oil tanker and then dumping a humble 265,000 litres of water at you for the effect of a dam bursting!!! Scary, but so cool as it looks impossible that that quantity of loud roaring water at speed could actually miss you.

One minute your in an earthquake and a tanker explodes...

The next, hidden sluice gates open, dumping thousands of litres of water directly at you, flowing over the entire scene, with a loud rumble, looking like this!

The water drops away just short of you giving only slight spray! Very impressive.

In the afternoon, we all went to see a car and bike stunt show, where mad, but highly skilled Frenchmen drive Vauxhall (Ooh, sorry, Opal) cars at stupid speeds performing handbrake turns just inches away from one another. The show was split up into many scenes, to build up an action mini movie that was shown at the end. This included setting themselves on fire, shooting at one another, driving through windows and up ramps, falling off roofs etc.

The presenters were asking for audience participation and walked in front of us, so I appeared on the big screen for a moment:

THE Photos:
Well, here's what you've all been waiting for, the picture of me with Mickey!
As I was going to be goaded into such photos anyhow, I decided to see how many I could get, BUT look as sullen and remorseful as I possibly could, rather than grinning inanely as everyone else seems to do.

It's remarkably hard to keep a straight face with a life size Disney character next to you and I burst out laughing as soon as most of these pictures where taken:

Dogga & Mickey (For Sarah!)

Dogga & Ariel

Dogga & Minnie (for Boo!)

Dogga & Nemo

Dogga & Baloo

Dogga as a lady... How did that get in there?

Dogga & Captain Hook

Dogga and a mini Eiffel tower

Dogga & Kim Possible

Dogga & Prince Phillip

Dogga & Pinocchio

Dogga & Narnia throne

Dogga & Friar Tuck

Dogga & Woody [That was '&', not 'with a']

Dogga & Cinderella's Castle

Dogga & Mr Incredible [My fave pic]

Addition...

Thanks to my bro in law for joining the Disney dark side and becoming my evil sidekick with my sullen picture quest and taking them all for me! :->

Best Lines:
While a bit stressed and navigating across Paris's convoluted motorway system, my Niece appropriatly leans over from the back seat and sticks her oar in by asking, "Is that a map of France your looking at?"
Nooooooo, we thought now's the time for a leisurely peruse though a map of Bulgaria! [Insert tongue behind bottom lip and push]

One evening, at that time the beers come out to play, the kids had been put to bed in their bunk and given their usual 15 minutes calm down period before lights off. However, about a minute after this curfew, we all hear a loud call come from the kids bedroom:

Niece: "Moooooooooooooom, he keeps telling me to kiss his ass.

Mom: "Oi, stop telling your sister to kiss your arse."

Nephew: "I'm not"

It all went quiet for the remainder of the night, but I was almost in tears hearing this!

Funniest Sight:

The first night, we all ate out at a German style steakhouse, which was great and remarkably authentic.
At the end of quaffing much steak and lager, a waiter walks past carrying an astonishing amount of used plates and uneaten food, all delicately balanced on one forearm. As he's cornering rapidly, by our table, centrifugle force pulls a knife and stray chip from the pile, both landing on the floor, and he carries on walking.
However, he was being followed by a little girl in a pink dress, who bends down to pick up, I presumed the knife, but she goes for the chip and consumes it there and then! LOL
Nothing like a strangers left over food, eaten from the floor eh?

On the last day, I decided to pay 12 Euros to go up in a Helium filled balloon:

Disney Land from 300 feet upNow that's what I call a car park!

Today, I'm most angry about: Rude French people pushing into queues and physically elbowing you out of the way if needed. I had a few blood boiling moments while away, and this made me think of them. Grrr
Grrr-O-Meter Rating: 7/10

21 comments:

Stu said...

HAHAHAHAHA!

HAHAHA!

*breathes*

HAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

Those photos have me almost peeing myself. Oh my god... could anyone look LESS impressed to be with such a host of Disney* characters.

Well done.

10 points and a gold star.

Hahahahahha!

*©2006 Walt Disney Corporation

Duncan said...

Nice one Phil, me and Mart had a good chuckle at the pics. lol at Luke and Amy too !

DoGGa said...

Hehehe, good to see your sharing the same sense of Humour Stu!
The photos are a pick of many blured ones of me laughing and not being able to keep a straight face.
The collection took a hard days work to achieve you know! ;-)
Cheers...

DoGGa said...

Yay. Nice one Dunx 'n Mart!

The walking man said...

You must have had a really good photographer to take them photos Dogga.

DoGGa said...

Credit has been added Walking Monster!

Omally said...

Excellent trip report!

Has Prince Phillip had plastic sugery then? Maybe it was a pressie for Her Maj's 80th.

I reckon you should send your tale about your nephew 'n' neice into some women's mag as they always have a 'The Things Kids Say' section. I'll give you a fiver if it's published :)

boo said...

lol@nasty sneer in almost all the pics. thanks for the minnie shot, u two looked so happy together, then again not as happy as u & pinocchio :p *all the best*

looks & sounds like u had fun :)

p/s we need to buy stu noo pants
pp/s dogga a woody KILLED me :p

neice - amy said...

we hd a gr8 tme thr phil and i do hv sum dumb moments lolz

Limping Sis said...

Ooooops! So sorry about suitcase but you cant really be angry with someone with an ankle that is soooooo sore, swollen and bruised. Sob sob! Hope i am getting your sympathy! Actually I think i have done you a favour, at least you can identify it easily now!!

Aoj said...

:) :) :) Your face in those pictures just cracked me up!!

DoGGa said...

Omally:
Cool! Yeah OK, a fiver it is. The bet is on! ;-)
The prince is Phillip Valiant or something, Dunno? LOL

Boo:
Glad your liking the pics! Minnie and me hit it off well. :-x

Neice:
Glad you enjoyed it too and may there be many more a dumb moment from you to entertain me! ;-0

Sis:
You have all my sympathy as normal Sis, but the suitcase mistake is unforgivable, sorry! :-)

Angela:
It was hard keeping a straight face and much tongue biting was going on. ;-<>

Dakota said...

So it was just another run of the mill, boring 5 day trip to EuroDisney ;)
Brilliant trip report, but the pics really made my day. Soooooo funny. Thanks, thanks, thanks for sharing :)

Sarah said...

Excellent photos. Yay!

DoGGa said...

Dakota:
No problem ;-) Glad you enjoyed them!

Sarah:
Cool. Cheers...

Anonymous said...

I think that carpark's possibly bigger than our village.

*When I say 'our' village, I don't mean we own it all, by the way*

JG

DoGGa said...

I'b be quite impressed if you owned an entire village, me thinks!

The carpark was ridiculous and was less than half full when I was there. I dread to think of the queues and crowds if it where full! Phew...

Cheers JG

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